Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Parenting Conflict

PARENTING

When my son was born he was not delivered with a user manual attached to him. My husband and I went through endless trials and errors raising him and we are still learning. It can be quite an adventure - rewarding one moment, challenging the next split second. 

Raising a child is no different from marriage; it is all about give and take. Playing the role of a co-parent is no easy task. It requires a big deal of patience, understanding and tolerance. While we both may have the same aim - to raise our child into a healthy adult, we may not have the same approach.

Communication and awareness

The key to avoid or get out of conflict is to talk things out. Discuss with your spouse what is the discipline method best accepted by both parties. Many new parent's approach on parenting is based on their childhood experience. Some might have been brought up in corporal punishment and believes that his/her own offspring should be disciplined the same way. If you vehemently oppose corporal punishment you must justify your argument with your spouse.

Equality
Discuss in a respectful manner. Keep in mind that both of you are equal. Do not show authority over your spouse. One rule we should always adhere to is - Never undermine your spouse or your spouse's parenting in front of your children. Children learn important life skills when they deal with parents with conflicts on parenting skills. A child will learn to ask Dad for things he knows Mum won't approve of and vice versa.

Take a note that a child will learn to manage disagreement through the way his/her parents handle conflicts in their household. Always keep in mind that our children are a mirror image of us. Be gracious and they will turn out to be alright. 

Despite all the disagreements or conflicts, you know that you and your spouse only strive for what is best for the children. Just relax, negotiate and you will both find a mutual point of agreement somewhere in the middle :)


7 comments:

bluedreamer27 said...

i definitely agree..
establishing a solid communication with your kids is such a great way to establish a strong bond between you as a parent and he/she as your kid....
If you both have a solid communication, your son can easily share out and express out what he feels because he feel
more comfortable talking with you.

I also agree wth the equality...and also teaching the child to manage any sense of disagreement from his parents...this will avoid conflicts..


oh my... why am i talking like a parent now LOL

thanks for sharing Mrryn.. i really learned a lot

Merryn said...

BD - :D You will be a GREAT parent ONE day :P Can't wait to see you being one.. u are already so great with your younger bro... well done :)

Ayie said...

good take on this merryn, i agree with your points

bluedreamer27 said...

thanks merryn.. just visiting you here again... have a great day and happy blogging

Unknown said...

Definitely agreed wif u. Both husband and wife are equal...

Unknown said...

Merryn, agreed wif u. I like this entry!

Montoya Jazhel said...

Hi Selina



i am Montoya Jazhel from the philiphines ,i was in a big problem in my marital life so i read your testimony on how Dr Ikhide help you get your husband back and i said i will give it a try and i contacted the Dr Ikhide to help me and he promised to help me get my problem solved. now am so happy with my life because all my problems are over. Thanks to the great Dr Ikhide for the help and Thanks to you Selina.

You can reach him with this email:- dr.ikhide@gmail.com and i promise he will not disappoint you.



I AM SO HAPPY…… remember here is his email:- dr.ikhide@gmail.com



































Kumusta Selina



ako si Montoya Jazhel mula sa pilipinas, ako ay nasa malaking problema sa aking buhay sa pag-aasawa kaya nabasa ko ang iyong patotoo sa kung paano tulungan si Dr Ikhide na maibalik ang iyong asawa at sinabi kong susubukan ko ito at makipag-ugnay sa Dr Ikhide upang matulungan ako at nangako siyang tulungan ako na malulutas ang aking problema. ngayon masaya ako sa aking buhay dahil ang lahat ng aking mga problema ay tapos na. Salamat sa mahusay na Dr Ikhide para sa tulong at Salamat sa iyo Selina.

Maabot mo siya sa email na ito: - dr.ikhide@gmail.com at ipinapangako ko na hindi ka niya bibiguin.



AKO KAYA NAKAKITA …… tandaan dito ay ang kanyang email: - dr.ikhide@gmail.com