To spank or not to spank?
It is an age-old question. I would love to tell parents not to spank their child but I can't, because to discipline a child we need to look at the complete picture. But what I like to say is if you need to spank, please do so only on the bum or hands; never hard enough to leave scars or unsightly marks of your handprint or the rod. Handprints are meant to look beautiful only on art and crafts, never on a child's face or body.
You spank your child so that they will think twice before being naughty again and to educate them on what is right; not to release your bottled up anger. Spanking often occurs in a spur of the moment when parents are extremely upset. If only we can hold back for 10 seconds before snapping, chances are we might not even need to spank.
How to hold back for 10 seconds? Look at it this way, the 10 seconds you hold can save you minutes or hours of guilt later on. The temptation to spank is there and like many other urges, all you need to do is to instill some self-control. There, that sentence has just taken up 10 seconds of your time. In that 10 seconds that you remained calm, you will find your anger subsiding and the chances of you hurting your child has gone down tremendously.
I am no softie when it comes to parenting. I am very firm and fierce even, but I just don't spank. I always apply the '10 seconds' rule before making my next move. It helps to prevent many unwanted incidents that I know I would just regret later on.
We have choices - to instill fear and pain or to talk and explain. I choose the later as I believe at the end of the day - love conquers everything.
5 comments:
sometimes kids must learn their lesson and be disciplined but of course not in a very abusive way...
Spoiling kids is not so kid too especially if it's too much because kids may take advantage of their parents
haha i am talking like a parent now
i also don'tlike spanking, as much as possible but there are ties when too much already and i had to do a little tap on elisse before...
it's hard to instill discipline most esp with growing kids who just love to explore and have their ways but it's not impossible
I totally agree with you!!! We are our childrens' finest examples. What will make out of them if we spanked them? It's violence. There is always another way to break a bad habit or bad behaviour, no spanking required.
In the term of spanking, once is enough. Then whenever the rotan is lifted, I think children will know they should behave. Too much spanking may make them numb to the pain.
Neither I have to say. If we beat them we teach them this is how we deal with things, and they can easily grow up to be abusers both with humans and animals. Spoil with love is fine, but not with materialism.
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